Pointless

It's 5:00am and I think it's pointless to try to sleep right now. My night nurse called in AGAIN and I don't have one scheduled for the next 2 nights either. I went to bed about 11:30pm and so far I've been up at 12:30, 1:30, 2:00, 2:30, and since 4:30. Autumn keeps beeping and she is at a breathrate of 28 and on oxygen as well. I have flipped her and she does not need suctioning. I think it's more tiring to fall asleep for 30 mins and then have to keep getting up and down then just staying up. The problem is James has to go do his assessment for work at 11:00am and then get the oil change in our van for our trip Monday (which always takes forever) so I probably will not get a nap today. I'm tired. Madison and I shopped all day and I did not get hardly any sleep the night before (sharing a bed with Madison). We will have a nurse Sunday night and then off to Dallas with no nursing for the next week and a 6:30am dr. appt so I'm sure by next Friday I will be ready to crash. I think I will have to call the nursing agency tomorrow about hiring a 3rd night nurse. In September neither nurse can do my weekends when James is working so I think it's time to break down and get another back-up even though I hate training and getting to know new nurses. Sweet Autumn has not beeped since I gave up sleeping and came to blog...that's about right. ;) Maybe I will try to give sleeping one more chance and see if I can get in 2 hours before having to wake up to give her meds and feed her. Actually, if I give her meds right now then I can maybe get another 30 mins in??? We'll see.