My little pity party

I am feeling kind of sad this evening. I just got back from a PTA meeting for Madison's school. We received a calendar of events and I found out I will be missing Open House and Math night at her school for sure and there may be a few other events I will not be able to attend. I know these really aren't big deals but I am one of those moms who has to be invloved and present for everything. Math night was a night Madison and I always had fun trying to guess the different games to win prizes and last year we won a neat Halloween basket. I also felt bad not being able to volunteer for anything because I am not sure what my life will consist of once Autumn is here. I am not sure how much I will be in doctor appointments and traveling back and forth to Dallas. It is like my life is on hold until Autumn gets here and I am not really sure if then we will know all that will be in store for us. I want to let my kids get involved in activites but feel we need to wait to make sure we will be able to attend practices. I am nervous that Autumn's condition is going to limit what Gage and Madison are able to do as well because of all the care she may need. Most days are wonderful and I do not feel sad about what we are going through and actually feel blessed but there are those rare nights like tonight that I just feel down about things. I know I will wake up tomorrow and everything will be fine again but tonight I just want to be depressed. I guess that comes along with the emotional rollercoaster of dealing with these kinds of things. I guess it does not help that the kids are at Nana's and James is working. :(